Hello…

I am a former boy scout, altar boy, baptized and confirmed atheist.

I make around $35,000 a year.

I am a committed social worker and divorced, college graduate.

I work out every day, but really like Popeye’s chicken so sometimes, one step forward, two steps back.

I rent. I have no debt. I own a car. I don’t want a car but I need it for work, oh and I’m kind of a workaholic.

I am a Taoist, and an Anarchist. I dislike the police. I really do, but because of my job I work with the police every day so go figure…ah, life…funny.

I own almost no furniture, but I have a lot of books, and I read them…

Republicans and Democrats…I am hard pressed to think of a politician from either party you could put in front of my car where I wouldn’t speed up…

I would only agree that British Petroleum, TransOcean, Anadarko, Nalco and Halliburton, or any other corporation should be entitled to corporate personhood if we could put them on trial and sentence their person to the death penalty.

My life? Well, it’s pretty good…can’t complain, actually.

I got plenty of money, don’t want for much, am productive, artistic, meditative, and on a really good day, have enough disgust with people and society to melt a piece of glass at one hundred yards…with one eye.

It’s a gift.

Oh, but why am I so angry?

Well, some people, so I understand, want to have children, houses, health care, credit cards, family, labor day picnics, pay for weddings, funerals, even cancer treatment.

Oh, and you know what else?

These people? These entitled people not only want kids, they actually want to have time…yeah, actual time with those actual kids.

I dunno. I don’t get it either.

Oh, and check this out…these people with their kids and their houses and their family get-togethers?

Yeah, they also don’t want to be buried in debt. They don’t want to have to choose between electric bills and tetanus shots, groceries and physical exams, rent and a decent night’s sleep.

Slackers.

These neo-hippies think it would be a good idea to actually have the time to raise their families and I’m sorry, as a member of the the 53%, who feel to demand changes in the way our institutions operate, to demand the ultra-rich make a little less money, maybe pay their share in taxes in hope for a more equitable society, well, me and Eric Erickson, we recognize that for what it is…

Unamerican.

Seriously.

These bastards actually want the time to make their marriages work, time with their wives or husbands…and not just time over their bills, at the plasma donation center or out picking up aluminum cans, but times on vacation, maybe an hour in the park, go to a movie, go to church, play a board game…Life, Monopoly, Sorry, Clue…anything.

And that demand for time and equality is nothing more than lazy Socialism.

Look, it’s not that I don’t treasure the family, the house, the two cars, the whatever…it’s just that hell, I am a social worker. I have two college degrees, I have no debt or health problems, and very little chance for unforseen expenses. I have no desire to live outside my means, no desire for kids or furniture, time to myself or groceries for more than one person. I have no desire to work more than 47 hours a week, car insurance beyond what’s legally required, a house of my own or new clothes, dental care and fresh food, or gas…nope.

I don’t need any of those uppity trappings.

And since I don’t…

Why in the hell do you think you should?

Look…the American Dream is a subjective moment of subconscious paralysis, and the quicker you realize this, the happier you will be…

Like me.

Financial fraud isn’t a crime, it’s simply being creative. As a modern day American, I recognize my patriotic duty as a simple willingness to play host to every financial parasite and politician.

So to the banks, to those who would deregulate, to their political enablers I lie prone and smile.

Have your way with me. I recognize I have no right to complain.

I may be of the 99%, but I am more inclined to be the 53%.

So, I’m yours.

God Bless America.

Read the articles…

Open Letter to that 53% Guy

Have a nice day.