I enjoy thinking about how they interact, how they make me feel. I think about this a lot. Last night I was sitting at a bar on Geary Street, texting with my partner about missing these conversations I had with a friend on the darker aspects of life. She humored me and we reflected on the impact of death in our lives, she who has … Continue reading Death and life…and EMDR
…and what does that mean? Let’s start with the impossible job I mentioned in a previous post. Yesterday I was at work when I saw through my office door the site nurse on the move with her vitals equipment. I emerged to discover one of the staff behind closed doors in an office being treated by said nurse and I moved towards the lobby, towards … Continue reading Meeting darkness with vulnerability…
It’s Christmas day. I feel alright, more or less, sitting in my apartment in the Tenderloin, San Francisco. My partner, parents and most of my friends are in the Midwest so I’m out here alone, but that’s okay. I think Christmas for me is mostly a non-issue, unavoidable but at the same time not really resonating no matter how much I used to enjoy the … Continue reading It’s Christmas…
I leave for work in two hours, where I manage the support services in a building with 140 highly acute residents. There should be a staff consisting of my role, an assistant manager, and five case managers to do the work, but what we have is me, and three case managers, one of which is starting today and two who work four day schedules. Despite … Continue reading An Impossible Job…
I moved back to San Francisco 8 months ago, a long debated change influenced by past memories, thoughts of meaning, the pandemic lock downs and a growing dissatisfaction with a repetitive, routine Chicago. This relocation was supposed to be a solution, get me back to doing the work I loved in an environment I related to where I could once again, begin to see my … Continue reading Back in San Francisco…
This past Friday I was able to call three clients and let them know their treatment had been successful, and their Hepatitis C was cured. Then I had a chicken burrito for dinner and finished off the night by taking psychedelic mushrooms and listening to music without thinking for awhile. It was all quite pleasant. And…Marjorie Taylor Greene, Matt Gaetz and that idiot from Colorado … Continue reading This past Friday…
Standing at the corner of Eddy and Polk Street in San Francisco, looking at the combination KFC/Taco Bell restaurant, thinking. Do I want greasy fried chicken? That’d give me heartburn, but Taco Bell is so much what the fuck did I just eat? Maybe I should go somewhere else, get a slice of pizza at the place up the street. I glance left where crack … Continue reading Connections
Over twenty years ago I had a singular experience. I was in the Pacific Northwest driving on the 520 Bridge spanning Lake Washington between Seattle and Bellevue. The morning sun was coming up. The floating bridge rocked gently on the water. I pushed the accelerator down, smoking a cigarette as I drove towards my apartment on the Seattle side of the lake. My car windows … Continue reading Stripped
Like many of you, I have been reading about the coming forced evacuations of the 120 plus homeless people who currently reside nightly underneath the Pontchartrain Expressway in downtown New Orleans. City officials began handing out 72 hour notices on Monday evening, citing health violations, safety concerns and drug use as parts of the problem which are necessitating this move. Outreach workers will be on … Continue reading The shelters may not be the answer for all under the Pontchartrain Expressway…
I woke up this morning in San Francisco, stumbled to the coffeemaker and then to my desk…and after turning on the computer, I put on the latest release by GoatWhore, one of New Orleans finest metal bands and leaned back in my chair. Coffee was good, not chicory good, but certainly Peet’s good. I heard shouting from the street, then police sirens and I turned the … Continue reading It’s a love/hate thing…now featuring GoatWhore!
Drake Toulouse: Photography and Words 