A funny thing has happened in the Gulf of Mexico these past couple weeks…that oil spill?

It’s over, the oil spill is more or less over, all taken care of so you can switch the channel now.

The fisherman will be back at work soon, the oil isn’t in the marshes, it’s not on the beaches and it certainly isn’t flowing out of the Macondo Well. The wildlife, all good, didn’t you see that they relocated the sea turtle eggs and they’re now hatching on a different coast? And British Petroleum put up 20 billion dollars that will take care of everybody. No one has to suffer, not really…not anymore. Yeah, we’ll still have the occasional tar ball for a little while, but just send out your kids with toy shovels and a bucket so they can scoop it up and carry it over to a very tanned lifeguard in his chair; he’ll contact BP right away.

Tragedy yes, terrible…agreed.

It took a very long time to solve this problem, BP knows, they understand, but the important thing is its solved. Didn’t you hear? Skimmers are being sent home…no oil to clean up anymore, not really, at least not any that Thad Allen can find because the dispersants have gotten rid of it all. Those closed fisheries? They’ve started to reopen, no matter if they are still toxic and the EPA and FDA haven’t been trustworthy on the effects of the spill…these are mere details. With few minor exceptions, all is going according to the plan. They’re even removing boom now, it was doing more damage than good, don’t ya know…British Petroleum and the Coast Guard would like to thank you for your patience, America. Though we’re certainly not out of the woods, the clearing is in view and that view is a beautiful sunset over a body of water that in very short order, will be crystal clear again. In fact, it’ll be even better than before…

Well, that’s a version anyway.

Unfortunately, it is quickly becoming the official version for too many mainstream media outlets.

Oh yeah, and it’s bullshit.

From Riki Ott’s outstanding article in the HuffingtonPost:

Regarding the hard to find oil:

Bay Jimmy on the northeast side of Barataria Bay was full of oil. So was Bay Baptiste, Lake Grande Ecaille, and Billet Bay. Sitting next to me was Mike Roberts, a shrimper with Louisiana Bayoukeepers, who has grown up in this area. His voice crackled over the headset as I strained to hold the window. “I’ve fished in all these waters – everywhere you can see. It’s all oiled. This is the worst I’ve seen. This is a heart-break…”

Regarding the safety of chemical dispersants:

The dispersants used in BP’s draconian experiment contain solvents such as petroleum distillates and 2-butoxyethanol. Solvents dissolve oil, grease, and rubber. Spill responders have told me that the hard rubber impellors in their engines and the soft rubber bushings on their outboard motor pumps are falling apart and need frequent replacement…plastic corks used to float the absorbent booms during skimming operations dissolve after a week of use…medical doctor Ted Schettler and others warn that solvents can rapidly enter the human body: They evaporate in air and are easily inhaled, they penetrate skin easily, and they cross the placenta into fetuses. For example, 2-butoxyethanol is a human health hazard substance: It is a fetal toxin and it breaks down blood cells, causing blood and kidney disorders.

Regarding the downplaying of the dangers by BP, the Coast Guard, OSHA, NIOSH, the FDA and the EPA:

BP insists that solvents “disappear” after only a day or two. Retired toxicologist and forensic chemist John Laseter disagrees. Laseter told me that solvents “solubilize” or become soluble in oil and remain a threat for up to two months. He said the oil-solvent mixture sticks on biological tissue – gills of fish, the organic film coating sand grains and raindrops – and can wreak havoc. He told me that the dispersants are “almost certainly” making the oil penetrate more deeply into the skin and could very well be causing the rashes in the Gulf. The Mobile television station WKRG took samples of water and sand from Orange Beach, Gulf Shores, Katrina Key, and Dauphin Island. The test was nothing fancy. The on-air reporter simply dipped a jar into the ocean and another into some surf water filling a sand pit dug by a small child. In the samples, oil was not visible in the water or the sand, but the chemist who analyzed them reported astonishingly high levels of oil ranging from 16 to 221 parts per million (ppm). Except for the Dauphin Island sample — that one literally exploded in the lab before testing could be completed. The chemist thought maybe the exploding sample contained methane or 2-butoxyethanol.

Yet Mr. Dudley, soon to be CEO of British Petroleum believes it is time to scale back cleanup operations…

Hey Thad Allen, meet the new boss…same as the old boss!

Really, read the article,

Oilgate!     BP and all the President’s Men (except one) Seek to Contain Truth of Leak in the Gulf (Photos and Video)

Have a nice day.