BP Sustainability Report Ignores Oil Spill, and Tony Gets a Bonus!

My life back? Eight million pounds goes a long way, bitches!

British Petroleum released their new Sustainability Report where they went to great lengths to discuss the lessons they learned last summer, and how BP’s Bob Dudley is now all about responsibility. Bob feels it is up to them to “earn back the trust” of all involved and dad-gummit, they’re gonna do it!

In their report, they discuss how BP:

“From the beginning…worked to fight the spill and minimize its impact on the environment,” and how, “These efforts helped to reduce the amount of oil that reached the shore and environmentally sensitive marsh areas.”


Course, what’s missing from the report is any mention of how much oil was released, or any real assessment of how much damage was actually done to the environment or the people who reside on the Gulf Coast.

Umm, not so nice.

Yes, British Petroleum details all the spills they’ve suffered, the volume of oil unleashed, worker fatalities and injuries between the years 2006-2010, all except the oil spilled when the Deepwater Horizon exploded. Those quantities are missing, simply because British Petroleum feels it’s best not to admit to any numbers “due to (their) reluctance to report data that has such a high degree of uncertainty.”

Uncertainty…yes, from The Lookout:

“In the past year, scores of scientists from across the world have poured over data and reviewed video footage of the flow of oil spewing from BP’s busted well on the floor of the Gulf. And by consulting such sources, researchers have offered their own estimates of how much oil entered the Gulf at BP’s behest. What’s more, a vast range of experts who’d been following the spill closely agreed that the U.S. government’s final estimate that BP had released roughly 4.9 million barrels into the Gulf seemed reasonably accurate. BP officials, of course, cried foul and challenged the numbers, just as they did from the first day of the spill onward—they insisted on their own preferred figure of 5,000 barrels per day, which of course made the damage of the spill, and the corporate liability arising from it, seem minimal. Such low-end estimates were conceived, in the words of Fast Company, to “greenwash” the scale of the spill’s impact.”

And perhaps all that uncertainty might explain why Tony Hayward will receive, upon stockholder approval at their April 14th meeting, a stock bonus worth 8 million pounds. You see, he actually did a heckuva job, increased profits, and to beleive the sustainability report, did not preside over the worst oil spill in United States history, leaving his job in disgrace. Word is, however, stockholders aren’t buying it, they’ve seen the press and they know, they know something happened in the Gulf of Mexico, course that was such a long time ago and nobody really reports about it anymore…but still, something happened, right? Stockholders are being urged to vote down the bonus.

But, back to the sustainability report, so why might British Petroleum drop the volume of oil spilled from their report?

Same reason British Petroleum does anything, anything at all.


From a footnote in the report:

“Although there are several third-party estimates of the flow rate of total volume of oil spilled from the Deepwater Horizon incident, we believe that no accurate determination can be made or reported until further information is collected and the analysis, such as the condition of the blowout preventer is completed.”

In other words…BP is unwilling to confirm any of said estimates because they are disputing the numbers, which more than likely has a lot to do with a certain $1100 per barrel fine BP will have to pay under the Clean Water Act. 

And since, as mentioned, such estimates are so unreliable, better to just leave it out of their Sustainability Report altogether. How’s that for Dudley’s responsibility, for endearing trust with “actions, not words.”

Really, not so nice…

My guess is Tony Hayward hopes BP continues to fight on, deny, deny, deny…after all, not only the company, but Tony himself has got a lot of money riding on BP’s newest version of “responsibility.”

Have a nice day.

Tony Hayward “All the oil is gone.”

No oil in the Gulf...no oil in the Gulf...no oil in the Gulf... What? What do you mean it didn't work!?

Yeah, he said it, not kidding, while giving a speech to students at the Cambridge University Society and several explanations immediately come to mind:

1. He and Jane Lubchenco of the NOAA are still spending way too much time together.

2. He figured that if doing a tour can work for GW Bush, why not him?

3. The American press isn’t paying attention anymore so now he can really say whatever he wants.

4. He’s got this job in a Russian narco-state and if he needs to disappear, he’s got some new friends to help make that happen.

5. He’s an out of touch narcissist making a desperate attempt to convince himself that really, he’s an all right bloke, and all he has to do is say the oil is gone enough times so that not only will he eventually believe it, but due to his importance in world affairs and events (the focal point don’t ya know) the world will believe it too, after all, he’s Tony Bloody Hayward and don’t you forget it!


Check it out:

Tony Hayward, Former BP CEO, Addresses Cambridge Union, Says More Dumb Things

Have a nice day.

Tony Hayward Speaks at British Commons…and a response

So, couple of days ago, Mr. Hayward was questioned about British Petroleum’s safety record in England by the MPs and apparently, he had more to say to his local pol’s then he did when Congress had their go a few months back, you remember, when he gave an hour-long version of “Oh, I didn’t know.”

This time around, he offered up these gems:

In discussing all BP had spent on safety previous to the Deepwater Horizon Explosion that killed eleven men, “And it is undeniably the fact that because of all of that, this particular incident is so devastating to me personally because we have made an enormous amount of progress (on safety) in that three-year period.”

He also denied that cost cutting had anything to do with the disaster, despite all the money they saved by making risky choices in constructing the Deepwater Horizon, telling MPs “safety is the first call on every dollar BP invests. Before we invest in anything, we invest in safety”.

Oh, really…

Okay kids…please turn your heads…

Mr. Hayward?

Please…allow me to express my opinion here, just for a moment, just a second or two, just a few comments about you and your company’s “safety.”

First off…are you serious? Fuck you.

Second…safety comes first out of every dollar you spend?


I for one would hate to see what happens when it is second, third, or fourth. Had that been the case, rather than spilling 4.1 million barrels of oil into the Gulf of Mexico, you might have found some way to dump some substance even more toxic to make the whole oil spill even worse…something like, oh…I don’t know…Corexit. Yeah, that really would have fucked it all up.

Oh, and personally devastating to you?

I don’t give a goddamn if you obsess yourself blind every minute of every day for the rest of your life, or at least to the point of insanity, you pathetic, personality disordered narcissist. Course, a personality disorder makes a hell of a lot of sense as anyone who works in the mental health field understands the first point of a personality disorder is the person will have zero insight into their disorder, and the way you keep uttering these wholly inappropriate statements of personal pain and loss definitely indicates an asshole with zero insight.

But, I suppose I could concede one point, your oh so fucking hard work on your safety record over the past three years…yeah, that.

When your company blew up the refinery in Texas, fifteen people were killed…and this time, when the oil rig blew up, only eleven died so yeah, I guess that could be considered improvement…except for the fact that in the past three years you jack-holes have racked up over 750 safety fines by OSHA while Exxon had…one. One? Versus 750?

I haven’t been so disgusted with you fucking oil guys since that prick of a failed oilman from Crawford Texas got elected president and then sat back jacking while the city of New Orleans drowned. Yes Tony, you know him; he’s the one responsible for deregulating everything at MMS…but back to OSHA, in two separate disasters prior to the Deepwater Horizon, 30 BP workers were killed and over 200 injured, and your refineries in Texas and Ohio? They are responsible for 97% of the “egregious and willful” safety violations handed out in the past three years by OSHA.

97% of the safety violations.

Zero insight. You have zero.


And Mr. Hayward? Just in case your statements are some craptacular attempt to try to rewrite history through the wonders of repetition, through the unquestioned reporting of your distorted, bullshit words as fact by members of the mainstream media…let’s repeat this again: 3 BP accidents – 41 workers dead. BP – 760 safety violations by OSHA.  Two refineries owned by BP – 97% of willful and egregious safety violations handed out by OSHA over the past three years.


Read the article if you like…

BP Chief Tells MPs Gulf Spill Was Devastating to Me

Have a nice day.

Everyone but Mr. Hayward.

A jackass at least has some modicum of self-awareness. You?